Something Is Wrong...

Today I finally realized... something is wrong. Although it's been weeks, and I know I've slowly been acting strange; suddenly emo again; hotheaded even though I've learned to cool myself; feeling depressed for no odd reason... There is something wrong with me. I don't understand it completely though.
Even though today I was dragged to my sister's place to help out with some family spiritual ceremony for my brother-in-law, I was completely useless. I suddenly felt angry after three hours over there just reading manga on my laptop. All I was supposed to do was let the kids play the Wii in my sister and brother-in-law's room, and watch them. Yet when the kids left and I couldn't do anything about it but sit in there by myself I was able to breathe and think. Yet the only feeling that came across, or the only thought was: "this is so bothersome. It is a hassle. What is the point of me being here?!" and so on.
Honestly, I always think like that when I have to watch my nephews but perhaps it was just how today started. I was basically beaten up from bed by my mom because she couldn't go to the spiritual ceremony without me. Though I didn't really understand why since I wasn't even all that important in it. I did nothing. So yes, my day started out like crap and I guess it ends like crap. Yet, people, I just don't understand what is wrong.
I did feel like it was bothersome, and selfishly got angry to myself. However, I just don't understand why. Why was it bothersome, when I came to help? Why did I get angry, when I took out my anger in the car already? It was almost as if I was being selfish and wanted attention. But the me I've always known, the REAL me actually wants nothing to do with getting attention. I am a recluse. I prefer being left alone, by myself, wallowing in the shadows of my dreams and imagination. Inside the little fantasy worlds I have created. So why would I suddenly seek attention, or to be noticed and be angry because I was being treated as a recluse? What is wrong with me? Am I that twisted? How did I become like this?
I think by writing this, people will think that I am only looking for attention because I am actually like that. But I just want to get my feelings across, and to understand what the hell is wrong with me.
I am worried and anxious even though I shouldn't be and have no reason to be. I am afraid, hesitating even though there is nothing in my way to block me. I am depressed even though nothing of the sorta to cause the depression has happened. I get mad quickly, which is true to my personality, but getting mad out of nowhere was never really known to me until recently. I just don't understand what is will all these feelings? I am not even in my BiPolarity mode, it's like all the feelings are just fighting inside myself to get control over my emotions. I just don't understand, and am very confused.
So I wonder if I have lost something? Something important? Or did I perhaps get lost myself? Am I found, but haven't taken hold of something I was supposed to? Am I missing something or just don't know something? Has something happened that has affected me, and I have no recollection of it? I just... don't understand what's wrong with me. Something is wrong.
It is frustrating. I just don't understand anything at all anymore. I don't know what I am supposed to do. Am I just walking around trying to live everyday without living it? A life without life? Something is wrong... don't tell me I didn't warn you...